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Is Peace Possible?

  • Posted on September 8, 2014 at 10:00 AM

Peace is an elusive concept in contemporary society. On the one hand, we fight wars abroad and we’re so comfortable in our lives that many seem to forget that we’ve been continuously at war for over a decade. On the other hand, we fight different kinds of wars on our streets—wars against immigrants, against drugs, against gangs, and against each other. If we had yet a third hand, we could count the verbal wars that take place in our political bodies, in our dialogues about significant matters, and even in our dialogues about trivial matters. And if we had yet a forth hand, we could count the wars that rage within each of us between what our conscience dictates and the weakness of our flesh—wars for our very souls. So, it seems self-evident that peace really isn’t possible.

There are powers within this world that would have us believe that is true, that peace isn’t possible; if we give up on peace, then we give those who want war power over us. Yet peace is a choice. We can make peace with ourselves, both between our spiritual potential and our earthly present. We can make peace with those we disagree with and even cooperate and collaborate with them. We can bridge the divides that separate us and make peace on our streets. We can even make peace in the world. So, contrary to the obvious, peace is possible.

The autism community is fractured. There is a side—a loud, squeaky-wheel, powerful side—that wants to do anything and everything to cure autism. There is a side—a loud, squeaky-wheel, growing side—that wants to do anything and everything to protect people with autism. There are various factions interspersed among these two sides that prove that our reality cannot be defined and delimited as a dichotomy. The autism community is at war.

There are some among us that will never choose peace. This is not due to their convictions that they are 100% right and the others are 100% wrong, as it may seem. It is because they want war, because they thrive on controversy, because they choose to grasp for power, to exert their control, to have their say, and to get their way. For some, war is a way of life, but these people are only a small percentage of the autism community. They succeed only because we let them.

Most of us want peace. We want cooperation. We want collaboration. We want things to get better. And we’re willing to work for it. But we feel overwhelmed and overwrought. It can be so hard simply getting through the day that we leave ourselves little energy for peacemaking. It seems easier to fight for the specific things we believe in and want than to make a peace that will provide those things. Besides, we have few contemporary examples on how to bridge such divisive issues into workable, cooperative, collaborative solutions. Is peace possible? Perhaps, perhaps not. The answer lies within us. We have to choose.

Maternal Stress

  • Posted on November 13, 2009 at 11:53 AM

According to a news brief: “the daily physiological and psychological toll on mothers of adolescents and adults with autism is documented, revealing patterns of chronic stress, fatigue, work interruptions and a significantly greater investment of time in caregiving than mothers of children without disabilities.”  The study cited revealed “physiological residue of daily stress” in the form of significantly lower cortisol levels.  According to this brief of the study results, the primary distinction they looked for within the population of mothers with autistic children was “a history of elevated behavior problems.”

While I certainly recognize why this distinction would be appropriate from a research stand-point, I propose an equally important distinction would be to consider parental response.  After all, behavioral patterns of the children are not within the parent’s control, but the behavioral response of the mother is within her own control.  The news brief concluded with this statement from researcher, Leann Smith: “We need to find more ways to be supportive of these families.”  I do not disagree, but perhaps there is something more immediate that parents themselves can do for their own health and well-being.

See I have a hypothesis: mothers who accept autism will have more healthy stress levels and less stress-related health risks than mothers who are constantly fighting against autism.

The key thing for me is this:  “Cortisol levels were found to be significantly lower than normal, a condition that occurs under chronic stress, yielding profiles similar to those of combat soldiers and others who experience constant psychological stress,” (emphasis added).  Considering that many mothers who are traumatized by their child’s autism use language similar to that used in warfare – like “fighting” and “battle” – is it really surprising that they would have profiles similar to combat soldiers?  They are combat soldiers—they are waging a war against autism.  Think of the “I Am Autism” video.  That video used the language of war, not unlike the language used when describing terrorism that happens in one’s home country.

As parents, we can choose to bring stress upon ourselves by waging a war against autism, embracing the psychological risk-factors of a soldier’s lifestyle in the process.  Or, we can choose to be parents, not soldiers, and simply raise our children.  Personally, I believe the latter is the better choice, for our own sake and for the sake of our children.  I hope they continue this line of research and add other factors to see how parental responses to autism affect the outcomes for those parents.