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Ending the Hiatus

  • Posted on August 17, 2010 at 6:35 AM

It’s been a busy summer.  I graduated with a Bachelor’s degree, launched a business, and started working on my Master’s degree.  I started two novels, a nonfiction book, and many shorter projects.  And, of course, I’m always trying to keep up with my boys.

Soon, Ben will be transitioning from the intensive to the post-intensive stage of Wisconsin’s autism waiver, which means more flexibility but fewer hours of therapy.  Willy is going to middle school, which is a point of anxiety and excitement.  Alex is still struggling with bouts of aggression, but has been much happier this summer.  There’s been considerable excitement, loudness, and activity all around.

Recently, my brother, my uncle, and their friend—along with a lot of local helpers—implemented a landscaping plan to address the leak in the basement.  Unfortunately, the only rain we’ve had since then was a big gusher—four and a half inches of rain in an hour and a half, but it rained for much longer than that—and it did not give us a clear idea of whether or not our efforts were successful.  The cleanup work is still not done, but I’m doing a little at a time.  The important thing is the system is in place and should work during a normal rainfall.  But, there is still a lot of rock and dirt to move.

Despite all the activity and all the good things that are going on, I have been struggling with depression.  Perhaps it would be more accurate to say “because of all the activity and all the good things that are going on, I’m struggling with depression.”  Each day there is more to do than I can possibly get done and I’ve tried for too long to do it all anyway.  Working on the landscape project was unavoidable—it’s my house and there wasn’t as much labor as we needed—but after that I let myself crash.  But I predicted that, so it’s all good.

I guess the point is that I’m back, but I’m still tired and still trying to get back to a manageable schedule.  But my to-do list is still over-full.  Hopefully I don’t work myself to a crash again this year, but that’s the risk of being me.